Monday, February 13, 2006


Remember way back, when The Wizard of Oz was shown on TV once a year? I believe it was in the fall. The next day at school, we would all be discussing what the best parts were. And somebody would mention the part where the movie starts to be in color. I didn’t know what point that would be, because it was black and white all the way through on my TV! Which explains why I didn’t see the humor in the “horse of a different color” joke until I became an adult. My children can’t fathom a world where you had to wait a year to see a movie. I say it builds character!

Wizard of Oz characters gone bad, written by wdh.

I would sneak into the showers
During the school's late hours
Hiliarium will reign
I'd put it on the potty
And then it would get all spotty
If I just had cellophane
They would then relieve upon it
Coming down like a comet
it won't go down the drain
The bathroom would start stinkin'
From all the stuff they're drinkin
If I just had cellophane

When your butt is so unwilling
But you want to "send it spilling"
Your prank gets torn apart
I'd break the quiet tension
With some power gas ascension
If I only had to fart
While it'd be detrimental
It would sound so instrumental
It'd be a true piece of art
I would let out all my chili
It'd be funny- really, really
If I only had to fart

Yeah, it's fun, believe me missy,
When you get to beat up sissies
Who like to study birds
I like to show off my power
While the little pipsqueak cowers
I want to beat up the nerd
The pain I'll start applyin'
While the twerp starts dyin'
Destruction is the word
After I beat his face in
His glasses will need replacin
I want to beat up the nerd

Somebody had to do it. Frank Oz is the Wizard in a Star Wars mashup, The Wizard, Oz.

The Wizard meets Goodfellas in this parody script.

The Wizard of Oil, the US involvement in the Middle East plus The Wizard of Oz.


Collection of Wizard of Oz comics.

there would likely be some changes...

10. Grizzly scene in which Dorothy blasts flying monkeys
out of the sky with an uzi

9. "Katie bar the door! There's a giant asteroid headed
straight for Oz!"

8. Dorothy steps outside and says, "Like, this is so not

7. Instead of "oil," tin man moans, "Viagra."

6. Kathie Lee Gifford plays Dorothy -- audience roots for

5. It would be named "Twister II"

4. To prepare for his role as the Scarecrow, DeNiro would
actually have his brain removed

3. Lovable dog Toto replaced by lovable droid T.O.T.O.

2. "Lions and tigers and bears, oh fu**!"

1. New title -- "Wiz Got Game"


Wizard of Oz website.
International Wizard of Oz Fan Club.
A fansite with lots of links.
Oz fans in costume.

Yep, there's no telling what you'll find on the web when you just wander around. I found a battle between two movie: The Wizard of Oz vs. Monty Python and the Holy Grail. "A heated argument broke out at the D&D tournament between Glinda the Good Witch of the North and Tim the Enchanter. It eventually escalated into a high stakes wager - the loser is barred from competition for life, turned into a newt and flattened by a farm house." See how Dorothy and her friends fare against King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table.


Thought for today: Certe, Toto, sentio nos in Kansate non iam adesse.
You know, Toto, I have a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore.


Susan said...

Wasnt that the scariest movie! Those flying monkies and that wicked witch gave me nightmares! I loved the songs, but then I am a sucker for any musical!

Congrats on being spotlight of the week at FTS!!!

Lucy said...

Miss Cellania

So glad to have found you. I was utterly hooked on the entire Oz story, probably because Dorothy was a rebel with a following. What a gal. Glinda, though, as I watched it for maybe the seventy-second time, wore on me. Dorothy's pooped, she's in an ill-fitting dress, and everyone is singing on fast-forward. Glinda's in her bubble proclaiming that all will be well. Easy for her to say. She obviously just came from the salon, and the boutique. She heads back for her afternoon cosmopolitan leaving Dorothy stranded amongst helium-eaters.

I think The Wiz is actually her husband. He reminds me of a lotta guys: all pumped up for the sport, but in reality he's just sitting on the proverbial couch, his gut hanging out, yelling meaninglessly. Behing many a Big Man there's actually a pipsqueak tooting his own horn.

But I'll leave the politics out of this for now. Besides, you've done a lovely job already.

Looking forward to reading more.

Sam said...

Too funny. No Heart, no Brain, and now with Cheney - No aim.
FTS sent me -
Love your blog!!

Miss Cellania said...

This FTS must have amazing charisma or maybe an iron fist, the way he can marshall the troops to do his bidding. But do you see HIS comment here? NNOOO!

Anonymous said...

I never say this movie until I was an adult.. but loved it non the less.

Anonymous said...

I think it was always on over Thanksgiving. It was one of the highlights of the year (television-wise) in a kid's life. It was still on when I was in highschool and we went so far one year as to have an 'Oz-fest' of sorts.