Wednesday, September 30, 2015

The Raccoon and the Breathalyzer

This report from last Saturday has people laughing out loud across the country. You have to ask why the raccoon didn’t tear the guy up when he first caught him. Well, he probably did, but he was drunk, so that part didn’t get mentioned in the report.

The thing is, it’s not true. The watermark logo is JTTOTS, which designates military humor. Yet enough people believed it to make the debunking itself worth news. People wanted this to be true because it paints such a funny picture. Expect to see the vignette incorporated into some movie screenplay before a year passes. (via reddit)

The Watching Tree

Miss Cellania's Links

7 Reasons Not to Climb Mt. Everest.

When America Was 'Great,' Taxes Were High, Unions Were Strong, and Government Was Big.

Award-winning photographer Magnus Wennman traveled all to photograph refugees from Syria and the Middle East. A series of his pictures showing where children sleep is accompanied by their stories. (via Metafilter)

Chaos Life has the most thorough and hilarious profiles of their cats. Meet Peter, Konstantin, and Jiji.

Beware of Republicans bearing plans to 'simplify' the tax code

Ridley Scott Talks about The Martian, Prometheus sequels, and his other movies. He’s hyped about the Blade Runner sequel he’s not even directing.

Does Shakespeare Need to Be “Translated” for Contemporary Audiences? No, but with a light updating, they could become more popular.

Watch a kitten with only two legs take his first steps in a custom wheelchair. His tragic life has turned completely around in his foster home.

This Woman Perfectly Explains Why You Shouldn’t Ask People Why They Don’t Have Kids. The reason might be a big deal that’s none of your business.

10 quirky life lessons from a single dad. He obviously once had a traumatic running-out-of-toilet-paper experience.  

They're Cold, Too

(Thanks, Stephanie!)

An Honest Trailer for Avengers: Age of Ultron

Screen Junkies does it again, with an honest trailer for a movie that hasn’t even been released on DVD and Blu-ray yet. That may be why these clips are so fuzzy -is it it just me?

The second Avengers film didn’t quite make the splash the first movie did, even after years of hype. They do have a point about the unbelievable requirements of Age of Ultron in regards to the rest of the Marvel movie universe. No matter, if you liked it, you’ll like it even after seeing the Honest trailer version. (via Tastefully Offensive

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

13 Joys of Autumn

Florival fr via Wikimedia Commons // CC BY-SA 3.0

Last week a popular post at Jezebel told us Fall is the Worst Season. It poetically compares autumn to the decline of life, which overlooks two things: first, the decline of life is when it has its fullest value and grows the sweetest, just like fruit. Second, autumn comes around every year, and if we are lucky, we get to enjoy many of them. Autumn happens to be my favorite season, and I don’t mind to share the many reasons why fall is the best.

1. Apples

Clare McBride via Flickr // CC BY-ND 2.0

Your local farmers market and grocery stores are full of apples of all kinds. Just a few years ago, they’d all be red delicious or golden delicious apples, and unless you had your own tree, there wasn’t much choice. But consumer demand led to an explosion in available apple varieties with different tastes and uses. Granny Smith apples are tart for making pies, while Honeycrisp apples are the kind you want to sink your teeth into. This autumn, you should try a few types you’ve never had before

2. Turning Leaves

Matthew Paulson via Flickr // CC BY-NC-ND 2.0
Every fall, I get a sudden urge to make a quilt. I’ve made maybe a dozen patchwork quilts in my life, back when I had a 9 to 5 job and watched TV at night, sitting behind my quilting frame. The inspiration I get this time of year comes from looking at the mountains, with their magnificent splotches of red, yellow, and orange along with patches of evergreens. The urge to start cutting fabric lasts until the mid-November rainstorm that brings the rest of the leaves down.

3. Falling Leaves

Raking leaves might seem like a chore, but when you get children involved, it can turn into a party. Who can rake the most leaves up the fastest? Who gets to jump into the pile first? Don’t take too long to decide, because the dog will take the first leap is he gets a chance! The oaks, walnuts, and maple trees that shade the yard are the reason I have to arrange an overflow bin for compost material in the fall.

4. Football

For fans of American football, the start of the school year means Little League football, high school football, college football, and the NFL. Pick your poison or enjoy them all! You don’t even have to be a football fan to have good memories of your team taking the field. You might just like tailgate parties, and who can blame you? For me, football reminds me of high school, which meant marching in the band, looking forward to the homecoming dance, the one powder puff game I actually played for charity, and the night I met that cute guy from another school. Actually, that happened a few times.

5. Harvest


Trevor Noah’s Debut on The Daily Show

He did pretty well, actually. There were plenty of jokes about the new kid, immigrants, and the passing of the torch, although that was wrapped up in news about John Boehner.

Miss Cellania's Links

A Shadow From the Twin Towers: The Story of Alicia Head. Head's elaborate lies carried her to the top of a 9/11 survivors' group, despite the fact that she was out of the country that day.

Down at the Sweetheart Rink. The 1972 photographs of Bill Yates capture a world I grew up in, even though I was in Kentucky instead of Florida.

We demand that women live in fear and behave impeccably to avoid 'asking for it.’

Kevin Hart meets an ostrich.

Scene-stealers and familiar faces: A field guide to 19 of today’s best character actors. Get to know them, because you’ll see them again and again. 

A Modern Treasure Hunt for Manhattan’s History. Finding one of John Randel’s 200-year-old surveyor’s bolts is a nerdy but glorious occasion.  

Why You Feel Like a Fraud and How to Overcome It. You may suffer from Imposter Syndrome, but don’t worry, everyone else does, too.

Parkour gets sexy thanks to amazing #StreetPole dancers. Feats of strength and grace have escaped strip clubs to go public.

Storing data in DNA would solve the world’s information storage problem, if we can get the cost down. The real problem would be if someone decided to use it in a cloning experiment.

This Is Why You Should Celebrate Banned Books Week. It’s a tribute to those who fight for the freedom to read, namely, librarians.


(via Fark)

Monday, September 28, 2015

Rate Me

How would you rate me on a scale of one to ten? That’s a question you should never, ever ask. It’s akin to asking if these pants make my butt look big. You don’t want honesty, you want validation. But you might get honesty instead. (via reddit)

Menu to Avoid

(via reddit)

Migrants and Refugees

Whether you call them migrants or refugees, they are all looking for a home. John Oliver explains what’s happening in Europe on Last Week Tonight. The very end of this is the best part. Especially if you are Najeem Mustafa.

Pick-up Attempt

The Wrong Way to Kill a Spider

This guy was gassing up his car when he saw a spider. He wanted to kill it. The first weapon he thought of was his lighter. Imagine what happened then.

The gas station clerk immediately hit the pump cutoff button and called the fire department. The guy who started it all (whose name has not been released) grabbed a fire extinguisher and put out the flames. It could have been so much worse. Strangely, the only thing destroyed in the fire was the gas pump. The car was barely touched, and no one was injured. (via Arbroath)

Miss Cellania's Links

Where’s the Rest of Me? Tales of a few notable missing body parts.

Matthew Buchinger was born in 1674 with no hands or feet and only parts of his arms and legs, but became an accomplished artist, calligrapher, magician, and musician

So, I Just Watched Star Wars for the First Time. Charley Locke has some revelations to share.  (via Digg)

Square Root of Kids’ Math Anxiety: Their Parents’ Help. (via Metafilter)

Anne Hathaway Can’t Win. She’s become an example of how women undermine other women who do well.

Key & Peele watch Othello.

How Miracle Max Nearly Shut Down The Princess Bride.

10 Mad Royals from History. Inbreeding and the pressures of the realm can drive one over the brink.

Frenzied Photos of Headbanging Heavy Metal Festivalgoers. Danish photographer Jacob Ehrbahn endured a lot of festivals to bring these images to you.

The 19 Creepiest Kids In Horror Movies. The cuter they are, the more horrified we are at their underlying evil.

Sunday, September 27, 2015

Birthday Picture

Today is my birthday. Not a big deal, I've had plenty of them. (via Fark)

Police Dog Report

(via reddit)

Saturday, September 26, 2015

Trump Debates Trump

If so many people are tuning into the Republican debates only to see Donald Trump in action (which is what he claims), then an all-Trump debate would garner the highest ratings of all! Ellen Degeneres has the right idea. If there were an all-Trump 24/7 channel, some people would tune in all day -while others would wait for the highlights to hit YouTube. (via Boing Boing)



The Warriors: Last Subway Ride Home

The cast of the 1979 film The Warriors reunited on September 13th for The Warriors Festival in Coney Island. How did that go? The actors arrived by the Q train, of course, recreating the journey in the movie in which they left the city gang wars to return to their home turf on Coney Island. Rolling Stone followed along with cameras. It was a little different this time around. For one thing, the subway cars are no longer covered in graffiti. There was no turnstile-jumping, of course. And along the way, they met fans of the movie and even modern day gang members! See more videos of the event at Rolling Stone. (via mental_floss)

Friday, September 25, 2015

MST3K Does Manos: The Hands of Fate

Mystery Science Theater 3000 takes on the worst movie ever made, Manos: The Hands of Fate. Read about the making of the film, how it was lost, found, and restored, and the fight over the rights to it, at Playboy. (via Metafilter)

Parrot Dances a Jig

A parrot on top of a coffeemaker. He may be dancing because the surface is hot, but if it were too hot, he’d just leave. Maybe he’s asking for a cup of Irish coffee? (via Arbroath)


Miss Cellania's Links

12 Acts of Genius Ripped From the Tabloids. A few scandals, and some interesting tales about Nobel Prize winners.

The Missing Pilot and the Crash That Rocked Alaska’s Golden Age of Aviation. That’s when they realized how dangerous their job is.

Fall Is the Worst Season. I disagree, as someone who has lived through many a cold winter.

How Internet Magic Helped a Quirky Cartoonist Find Success. It’s about Kate Beaton, one of my very favorite webcomic artists. 

A Kentucky legislator is suing to overturn anti-bribery laws, because they interfere with his right of free speech. Well, if corporations are people and money is speech, he may be right. (via Boing Boing)

If you’re in New York this weekend, you catch The Rocky Horror Picture Show 40th Anniversary events. That is, if you’re still young enough to do the Time Warp again.

38 Cozy Cocktails Guaranteed To Warm You Up This Fall. Apple cider is such a versatile drink!

Strunk & White: Grammar Police. Never let your participles dangles around these two. (via Metafilter)

 50 Films That Capture the Dark Side of New York City. You know, the way it used to be in the ‘70s and ‘80s. 

Don’t Miss the Lunar Eclipse! People across most of North America and Europe, a large part of Africa, and all of South America will be able to follow the total lunar eclipse this Sunday night.

Thursday, September 24, 2015




Miss Cellania's Links

Please Please Me: the Beatles’ First Album. Eddie Deezen describes the one-day recording session.

20 Terrifying Animals That Could Have Come Straight Out of a Horror Movie. I don’t see how the Venezuelan poodle moth could be… oh dear, yes it is.

A teenage Syrian refuge refused to leave home without his puppy. Aslan Al Hakim carried little Rose more than 300 miles to safety in Greece.

How Well Do You Know Your Toes? I bet you can’t identify them all without looking.

Inside the tax havens that are helping the 1 percent steal trillions of dollars. An estimated $7.6 trillion is hidden away in nations that cater to the rich.

How & Why Do Leaves Change Color? I figured it was to make them easier to see while you rake them up, but the real answer is a bit more complicated.

The most popular type of home in every major American city, charted.

How a Concentration Camp Survivor and an American Huckster Created the
Magic Crystals of Miracle-Gro.

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Autumn Cat

Miss Cellania's Links

Cat Predation in England. The science of little killers.

To promote the The Peanuts Movie that hits theaters November 6, 20th Century Fox has a generator with which you can customize a Peanuts character. This one is as close as I can get to one that resembles me. (via Flavorwire

Harry doesn’t know much about his ancestors, but JK Rowling knows. She posted a look at the Potter family history and genealogy that explains the name and where all that money came from. (via Geeks Are Sexy)

The Selfie from Hell. Warning: terrifying.

How Cats Won the Internet. Maria Bustillos wrote a delightful essay that gets to the heart of the matter. (via Metafilter)

The History of Female Anger. And the various ways dismiss, belittle, or ignore it. (via Boing Boing)

The Screen’s Greatest Crime Lords. Meet 23 of the best mobsters in pop culture.

You are now free to sing “Happy Birthday” in public. A federal judge has declared the song to be in the public domain.

Indiana Jones and the raiders of the lost Hollywood franchise. Imagine all the ways Disney could screw up further sequels about the old-style archaeologist.

Massive Wartime Decoys and Camouflage Operations. Illusion played a part in winning World War II.  

Tuesday, September 22, 2015

Counterfeit Currency

Drinking Problem

(via reddit)

Men on a Ladder

Poor Parking Job

Or the greatest parking job ever, depending on how you look at it. I wish I knew the rest of the story behind this picture. (via Daily Picks and Flicks)

Miss Cellania's Links

Discovered in Dreams. Some of the world’s great inventions and artworks were inspired during sleep.

Not-so-final girls: 17 girls (and 1 guy) who didn’t survive their horror movies. They also serve, those who buy the farm before the final reel.

How the Vatican Investigated a Modern Miracle at a Leprosy Settlement in Hawaii. Saint Damien’s second miracle occurred in 1998.

Honest Gil for President! He’s got the formula down to the last detail.
Archaeologists Unearth Civil War Refuge for Escaped Slaves.

The Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards is accepting entries only until October first. See The Telegraph’s favorites here and here. (via Everlasting Blort)

How do you tell a 10-year-old that she’s HIV positive? JJ is about to learn the truth.

New Discoveries Could Explain What Happened to the Lost Colony of Roanoke. (via Science Chamber of Horrors)

Giving Random Stupid Intelligence On TV’s Get Smart. An affectionate look back at the ‘60s spy sitcom.

Ben Carson Shattering Stereotype About Brain Surgeons Being Smart.

Monday, September 21, 2015

Kid's Menu

(via Bad Menu)

Eggcorns Galore

This comment at reddit isn’t original, but it’s certainly worth passing along. How many errors do you see?

I hole-hardedly agree, but allow me to play doubles advocate here for a moment. For all intensive purposes I think you are wrong. In an age where false morals are a diamond dozen, true virtues are a blessing in the skies. We often put our false morality on a petal stool like a bunch of pre-Madonnas, but you all seem to be taking something very valuable for granite. So I ask of you to mustard up all the strength you can because it is a doggy dog world out there. Although there is some merit to what you are saying it seems like you have a huge ship on your shoulder. In your argument you seem to throw everything in but the kids Nsync, and even though you are having a feel day with this I am here to bring you back into reality. I have a sick sense when it comes to these types of things. It is almost spooky, because I cannot turn a blonde eye to these glaring flaws in your rhetoric. I have zero taller ants when it comes to people spouting out hate in the name of moral righteousness. You just need to remember what comes around is all around, and when supply and command fails you will be the first to go. Make my words, when you get down to brass stacks it doesn't take rocket appliances to get two birds stoned at once. It's clear who makes the pants in this relationship, and sometimes you just have to swallow your prize and accept the facts. You might have to come to this conclusion through denial and error but I swear on my mother's mating name that when you put the petal to the medal you will pass with flying carpets like it’s a peach of cake

Andy Samberg’s Emmy Opening Monologue

If you watch as much TV as I do, you had no reason to watch the Emmys last night, since you wouldn’t be familiar with most of the nominees. Even if you do watch a lot of TV, you knew the best of the awards show would be on the internet today.  Here’s Andy Samberg’s opening bit, which is being called one of the better parts of the evening. It’s the first video from Lonely Island in quite some time.

Miss Cellania's Links

Robert Indiana’s LOVE. The phenomenon came close to ruining the artist’s life.

Princess Leia is Nearly Two Years Older Than Luke Skywalker. The reason involves Einstein’s theory of relativity.   

How calico cats reproduce. (via Neatorama)

Samim Winiger has been testing algorithms by having artificial intelligence software caption video footage as it plays. Some of the scenes are decently close, but others are hilariously incorrect. (via Gizmodo)

The Long, Sweet Love Affair Between Cops and Doughnuts.

5 Historic Presidential Campaign Collapses. Sometimes everything goes south in a spectacular fashion, and all you can do is grab the popcorn and watch.

The Scandalous Affairs of Old Hollywood. Some ruined careers, others just seemed part of the way Hollywood works. 

10 Real Intersections With Unforgettable Names. I’ll meet you at the corner of Weird and Wonderful.

Retro Tops That Let You Float Like a Butterfly and Shine Like a Disco Ball.

1915 Footage of Monet, Renoir and Rodin Creating Art and Degas Strolling Down a Paris Street.

Saturday, September 19, 2015

Hanging Out in Monte Piana

You think driving your RV to a state park is camping? Try hanging a hammock over a gorge in the Alps! These highliners set up 17 hammocks for 26 people to sleep in under the stars at Monte Piana, Italy, and over the scenic gorge in the Dolomites where 18,000 soldiers died in battle in World War I.
Highlinemeeting 2015 took place last week. The photographs are stunning, and you can see more videos here. A good time was had by all. (via Laughing Squid)

Roy Rogers and Jerry Lewis

Have a Seat

Guzzler's Gin

Red Skelton’s classic drunk routine. (via Metafilter)


(via Fark)

Friday, September 18, 2015

Police Blotter

Key & Peele Blooper and Gag Ree

If you are a fan of the erstwhile series Key & Peele on Comedy Central, you’ve probably wondered how they can get through those hilarious routines without cracking up. Well, they don’t. Here we get to see the outtakes and bloopers, where we learn they had to do go through the script a few times before they could keep a straight face. Contains NSFW language. If you haven’t seen the relevant sketches, you’ll want to after seeing this. The series is over but many of the sketches are available online. (via Tastefully Offensive)

Handstand Kiss

10 Glorious Facts About Sunflowers

Sunflowers, in all their colorful glory, are a happy sight to behold—but there's more to their nature than just beauty. The multipurpose plants deliver healthy snacks, useful oil, and birdseeds. Let your garden knowledge flourish with these facts about Helianthus Annuus, in an article April Dailey and I wrote for mental_floss.

(Photo: Josh Haroldson via Flickr)

Miss Cellania's Links

A Few Things You May Not Know About Adam West. He’s been a lot more than Batman.

The 2015 Ig Nobel Prizes were awarded last night. Scientists stuck tails on chickens, measured animal urination, and unboiled eggs to get these awards.

21 Insanely Beautiful Spots To See Fall Colors Across America. Check each area’s fall foliage report to time your getaway weekend.

NPR fact-checks the Republican debate.

No Sleeping Cats. A short account of the rise and fall of I Can Has Cheezburger and its reality show LOLWork.

15 Critical Facts About ER.

The Ahmed Mohamed fiasco: When racial stereotyping meets scientific illiteracy.

Steven Spielberg said superhero movies will die out the way Westerns did. Here’s why he’s right.

How Scotch, Weed and 'The Big Electron' Conspired to Make George Carlin My Dad. Stories of the late comedian by Kelly Carlin.

The 50 Creepiest Films About Cults. A playlist for an interesting, sometimes absurd, but possibly disturbing weekend of viewing.

Thursday, September 17, 2015

Middle School Love Note

(via reddit)

Hungarian Bird Girls

Quittin' Time!

Miss Cellania's Links

Ig® & Beyond: Molluscs on Prozac, Swinging at a Cocktail Party. Further research from Ig Nobel-prizewinning scientists.

What Happens When Someone Leaves Millions to a Pet?

17 Painless Facts About M*A*S*H

Why Late-Night Television Is Better than Ever. One look at the picture shows what treasures await us.

A couple made engagement photos by recreating the scene from 101 Dalmations where Roger and Anita met each other. The entire sequence is just adorable.

17 Buttons Facebook Really Needs to Add After “Dislike.” Because pushing a button is much easier than typing a few words.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Calls Donald Trump. The new host of The Apprentice wants to know how it’s done.

10 Offbeat Travel Destinations that Feature Brilliant & Bizarre Hoaxes. It doesn’t have to be real to be interesting.

The science behind Teh Tarik, or Pulled Tea. It makes a good show, and also makes the milk frothy and delicious. 

Messing with Mother Nature: The Macquarie Island Ecosystem. Introducing a non-native species to control another invasive species works as well as the old lady who swallowed a fly.   

Hunger Strike

(via Fark)

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

Cure That Success!

Raccoon Asks for More

Rocksy the raccoon has no inhibitions. After all, she’s got a family to feed! After she eats all the cat food, she knocks on the glass door for more! Yeah, she got the name because of the rock she uses to knock. Feed me, woman! FEED ME! (via Digg)

College Game Day

(via reddit)

Group Portrait