Saturday, January 28, 2006

Olympics


The Winter Olympics are upon us again, opening February 10th in Torino (Turin), Italy. You can get all kinds of Olympic information at the Winter Olympics Blog. Why are the Winter Games so popular? Its basically two weeks of skiing, skating, sledding, and shivering. The nature of ice and snow gives us a clue: we are all watching intently, waiting for someone to slip and fall.

Those who remember the opening sequence to ABC’s Wide World of Sports will remember Vinko Bogataj’s wipeout on the ski jump more than any other clip. It made “the agony of defeat” a catchword that lives on long after the show ended. Its the banana peel effect.

This cartoon illustrates how we just love it when things go wrong.

Dave Barry on Winter Sports Without Fear.

There always gonna be humor when you have athletes with names like Picabo.

Take your mouse hand down the fast track in this Luge Game.

Failed ski jump video.

Skiing ostrich.

Ski jumping cow.

Ice skating monkey.

Curling. A cross between shuffleboard and, uh, slipping on ice. The last time someone asked me what my favorite sport was, I answered "curling". Thought it was cute.

In Dubai (its in the Middle east), snow skiing is done indoors. Doesn't THAT sound expensive! Sure. Remember, its a sultanate.

There are so many figure skating bloopers in this full-length music video Slide that I ached all over after watching it. This is the best illustration of why we watch the Winter Olympics.


Whatever happened to the Jamaican Bobsled Team?

Panorama photo entitled Snowboarding at the Winter Games in Aspen.

Panorama photo entitled Can’t Ski All the Time.

A collection of figure skating jokes.

To cut costs, there have been some experiments in combining winter sports with summer sports. So far, all these experimental sports have been dismal failures. See for yourself.
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Olympic Winter Games Drinking Game

First, lay in a stock of your favorite beverage.

Then, turn on NBC and observe the following rules:

1. Take one drink every time a NBC announcer invites you to "share a moment with the world."
2. Take one drink every time snowboarding highlights are backed up by rock-and-roll guitar/heavy metal headbanger music.
3. Take one drink every time a female athlete is described as "America's _____ing sweetheart." Take an extra drink if the athlete in question is "American's curling sweetheart."
4. Clap your hands and take one drink every time reference is made to "the revolutionary new clap skate" being used in speed skating.
5. Take one drink every time figure skating commentator Scott Hamilton shouts that a skater "NAILED!!" a jump.
6. Take one drink every time you hear a hockey announcer shout, "He shoots...he scores!" Take two drinks if you're watching women's hockey and you hear, "She shoots...she scores!"
7. Take one drink every time NBC promises to get "up close and personal" with an athlete.
8. Take one drink every time a skater is presented with a bouquet of flowers.
9. Take one drink every time America's quest for its first medal in luge is mentioned. Take an extra drink if America actually happens to win a medal in luge.
10. Take one drink and sigh, "That's good, mon" every time reference is made to the Jamaican bobsled team.
11. Take one drink every time the REAL Olympic theme is heard.




A message for all the athletes from me!

Thought for today: Luge is the only sport where you can die during the event and still win.

2 comments:

FTS said...

I (hic) haven't played (hic) drinking gamesh (hic) anymore sinch (hic) collesh (hic)

OldHorsetailSnake said...

The ostrich and the cow are amazing. And I know these are true stories because I was once married to that cow.

(On my site, the ** is to delete "l" and "o" in the word b**g, since that is a word that is banned from my place.)